The Trap
“I go from demanding he leave, to hoping he’ll change, to praying for
him, to kicking him out again; when he cries and overvalues me, I melt. I
think I’ve been starved for his love and attention for so long, that’s why
I get hooked in again and again.”
“It is so hard to stay angry. I will talk to him on the phone and he
will be such a jerk I want to bang my head against the wall because that
would feel better than talking to him - then as soon as we hang up its
like this fantasy about what he could be starts and I think how much I
love him and how much I need him. I need him about as much as I need Cancer -
yet I keep going back for more - it is torture actually.”
“Trust me when I tell you it is the periods of closeness that you miss
-but they didnt really exist anyway - they are just an illusion. I am
going through the same kind of situation -I am in the process of a break
from my N and I think I miss him like crazy - but when I am with him - he
drives me crazy.”
“For a long time, the pattern went on. He would be horrible to
me...guilt trips, criticisms, attacks on my character and parenting. I
would back way off and say that I wouldn’t talk to him anymore. Then he
would call me up with a sweet story about the kids or a friend, or
some nice thing and I TIME we would be able to get along. We would for
awhile and then BLAM!!! He’d zap me again.”
“If a Narcissist throws the “bad childhood” stuff at you, keep in mind
he might be trying to get sympathy and make an excuse for his atrocious
behavior towards you and/or others. If we let these people make us feel
sorry for them, we ultimately end up in the submissive position
again...just what they want. I can “pity” them yes...but I refuse to shed
another tear over the tragedies suffered by who is now, only a shell of a
person.”
back to "The Penny
Drops": A narcissist survival guide written by those who’ve
been there.
Narcissistic Personality Disorder
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